Previous Entry Share Next Entry
New Buffy Sue!
New MST. Back to Sues after that thing I did last time. Also back to Buffy for now.

Who Died And Made You Slayer?

Caroline:...the previous Slayer. Or was that supposed to be funny?

LJ: I thought it was kinda funny.

Caroline: SILENCE! We got to do one of your stupid comic book things, now we get to one of my Sues. 

LJ: That fic was terrible. It made me cry.

Caroline: Well, now it's MY turn!
The story of the slayer before Buffy.-Haley was the slayer before Buffy.

Caroline: Wrong! India Cohen was the Slayer before Buffy!

LJ: Dude, novels aren't canon. They're, like, published fan fic.

Caroline: Whedon approved. Good enough for me. 

She not an average slayer, she is also a witch who can see the future.

LJ: ...I actually kinda had hope for the story until we hit this.

She is 16 with brown hair and brown eyes. Her parents died in a car crash and she lived alone in her parents house. She has always had a crush on her best friend John but he will never find out.

Caroline: Tense-shifting. Why does it always have to be tense-shifting? Also, willing to bet Josh is a guy the author likes in real life.

LJ: Or a celebrity. 
"Haley wait up!" John said.

"I can't I have to stop this vamp!" I yelled. I was running as fast as I could to catch a vampire who has been running from me for weeks. I almost had him and I couldn't wait for my best friend John to catch up. This was my chance.

LJ: Why would she wait for John to catch up? 

Caroline: Damn, she sucks. Buffy never took that long to take out a vamp, except for the Feared Foursome. And they were pretty special, vampire-wise. 
"Please Haley, I can't run any faster!"
"Just wait here and ill be back soon I gotta catch him!"

LJ: Why does she like him? He seems whiney.

John was mad at me but I had to keep going.

Caroline: He was mad at her. For doing her job. He seems swell.

I had the vamp cornered. The cemetery gate was on one side and a tomb on the other. I punched him. He hit me with a side kick and I fell. I jumped up and kicked him with a round house kick. He fell back and hit into a tree. One of the low branches hit him and he was dust.

Caroline: Just like that scene when Buffy came back to Sunnydale in season two. Exactly like that scene.

LJ: Some fight scenes don't translate well to writing.
I ran back to get John and he was sitting on a tombstone, catching his breath.

LJ: For some reason, I always see sitting on gravestones as slutty. Emma Frost did it at Jean Grey's funeral. Buffy did it in some of the preview posters. Just a thing of mine. 
"Is the Vampire dead?" John asked.
"Yup" I said.

Caroline: Her jaw hanging slack, her eyes glazing over...
"so what now?

LJ: I guess the unnecessary capitalization in "vampire" was taken from this sentence.  
"I don't know it's up to you"
"Lets go to the movies"

LJ: Wow. This is so interesting!

Caroline: I knoooooow.
We started to walk and he was very quiet. I just starred at him most of the way. We've been friends for almost 7 years now. He always looked cute when he wore his blue button down shirt. He had his dark blonde hair spiked up and he had his cross earring in.

Caroline: I hung out with lots of gay guys in my day and, gotta say, this guy dresses pretty gay.

LJ: I think it might be a celebrity even more. That sounds like she's looking at a picture of him as she types, her heart beating faster, her hands beginning to tremble and sweat...

Caroline: Oh in the name of Thor shut up

His green eyes shimmered in the moon light, he was one of the cutest boy I've ever seen. I was debating whether or not to tell him that I like him. I decided to wait a few more weeks and just enjoy his company.

LJ: Way to wimp out. 

Caroline: She actually put an ellipsis to show the passage of time. In a serious story. Sad.

It had been three weeks since I'd decided to tell John I liked him.

LJ: Let's do the time warp again!

I picked tomorrow to tell him and hoped he would like me back. I was very nervous and I just wanted to see what he would say so I used my power to see the future to try and see what he would say.

Caroline: I'm pretty sure precognition doesn't work like that in the Buffy-verse. Random visions, judging from Cordy and Dru. I mean, there are the Oracles, but I'm not entirely sure that they're human.

My visions didn't always worked the way I wanted them to, but I had to try. So I went to my room, locked the door and sat on my bed. I closed my eyes and concentrated on John. I sat there for almost an hour and it hit me.

Caroline: ...the truck I had hijacked. It smooshed into a tiny red smear, letting India take her proper place as Slayer. 

LJ: And then India got eaten by zombie-mummy dudes. And yes, before you ask, I read the Buffy novels too.
I saw John in the park and he was sitting on a bench. It was dark out. I couldn't tell exactly when it was but it was very soon. He just sat there waiting when a vampire ran up to him and drank his blood. They both stood and John was now a vampire. I jumped off my bed and ran as fast as I could to the park.

LJ: Oh crap...

Caroline: WROOOONG! That isn't how you get turned in Buffyverse! A vampire drains you, bringing you to the brink of death. Thenm, he or she brings you back by feeding you with his or her own blood. You swap blood, then you're dead for about a day or so. Then you turn! It is a long process! MURAHGAG!

LJ: Sometimes you scare me.

I was running and my legs started to burn but I couldn't stop. I had to save John. I got there and no one was there. I could feel it. I was too late. I sat down and began to weep. Then I herd foot steps and jumped up. It was John! Maybe I wasn't too late!

Caroline: God, I hope you are.
"Haley, is something wrong?" John asked.
"No. I just had a vision, and it was horrible!" I began to cry again.

LJ: No, nothing's wrong, I just saw you die! Tee hee!
"Aww. It's ok. Come here." he said and walked towards me.
I hugged him and cried. And then I felt the sharp stinging in my neck. I was too late! John was a vampire! I could feel my life slipping away and then everything was dark.

Caroline: Wow. She's dead. Kinda early for that, but whatever, I'm happy.

LJ: Just for the record? There are other ways to show time passing.
When I woke up everything was bright. White was all around me, the walls, the bed, even the chairs. That's when I saw the tubes in my arm. I realized I was in a hospital. Then I remembered what had happened. John had been turned and drank my blood.


I touched my neck but all there was there was two little bumps. I healed fast because I was the slayer, so my wound was almost gone.

LJ: You know, Buffy had a scar from letting Angel feed off of her. To save his life.
That's when the door opened. It was a doctor. He was tall, dark hair and large brown eyes. He walked up to the I.V. and checked everything.

Caroline: He was tall brown hair? Gross.
"Good you're awake!" he said.

LJ: Bad, she's awake.
"Yea. So what happened am I ok? Can I go home?"
"not yet you must rest Ms. Sherwood"

Caroline: Grammar is your friend. 
"Ok when can I go home?"
"In a few days, we had to bring you back to life Ms. Sherwood, you were dead for a 30 seconds and you must be very weak"

Caroline: Oh God. She pulled a Kendra. She ripped off season one just so she could keep her Sue alive. Kendra was the exception to the rule!  
I died! Oh My God! John killed me. I couldn't believe it. I died at the hands of me best friend. And then I realized that this meant there was a new slayer.

LJ: Yes, you're much smarter than Buffy. Buffy didn't realize that by being slightly drowned, Kendra would be called.
"Listen Doc, I feel fine. I need to get home."
"well we can't force you to stay here so I will send a nurse in with your discharge papers."

Caroline: I'm pretty sure they could make her stay.
"Thank you!"
The nurse came in a few minutes later and I filled them out and went home. First I put a spell on my house to make sure John couldn't get in and I ran up stairs and sat on my bed. I concentrated very hard but nothing. Ugh! I was mad. I needed to find this new slayer.

Caroline: Psst. Smart girl. John wouldn't be able to get into your house anyway. You know, because vampires need an invite to get in. Even if you had invited him in as a human, the rules change after you get vamped. Just thought you should know.

LJ: Why does she need to find the new slayer? Doesn't she still have school and stuff?
And then I decided to do something about John and grabbed a stake and ran out the door.
It was an hour before sunrise and I heard him. John was behind a tomb and sucking some poor girls blood. I kicked him in the face and he fell back then stood up.

Caroline: How did she find him? Why was a girl in a tomb?
"Haley, How nice to see you're still alive! The last time I drank your blood you gave me a nice buzz! I could use that again!"

LJ: You apparently knew she was the slayer. Why are you so excited about this? You can't trick her again like the first time.
I kicked him. He punched me.

Caroline: You hit me once. I hit you back.
You gave a kick. I gave a slap
Caroline: You smashed a plate over my head. Then I set fire to our bed
LJ:  A kick to the teeth is good for some
Caroline: A kiss with a fist is better than none!


I threw a kick at his head but he caught it and spun me into a headstone and it broke. I got up and swept out his legs and ran to him and plunged a stake into his heart.

LJ: Booooring.

When I looked at him his face was back to his human one. He almost looked betrayed. And then he was dust. Nothing left of him but dust. I began to cry as I ran home. By the time I reached my house I was sobbing. My best friend was gone. I had no one left. I decided I needed to find this new slayer.

Caroline: Oh jeez. Schmaltz. 
I ran in my room got all my magic supplies and decided to do a spell that would boost my visions, so I could control them better.

LJ: Why in the name of Oofgar wouldn't she have done this earlier?

After the spell a sat still almost meditating and waited. After 20 minutes I had the most powerful vision ever.

Caroline: Bleagh. I'm imagining the sex metaphor magic scene again.
I saw a girl named Buffy. She was in Sunnydale. She was in 11th grade like me.

Caroline: Then she would've been a Slayer for, like two or three years by now. 

And she had friends, and a mother, and a watcher.

Caroline: If she just became a Slayer, then her watcher would be Merrick. Merrick died when training her and Giles was his replacement.  

Then stuff began to flash by so fast I could only catch major details. I saw 6 years of her life flash before my eyes.

LJ: But then I ran out of DVDs, er, visions, so I couldn't see the seventh season, I mean, year.

When I snapped out of it my nose was bleeding. It turned out that my spell made my vision go further into the future, not so I could control them.

Caroline: Couldn't you not control them to begin with?
Some of the things I saw were bad. Almost horrible. I needed to help Buffy. I needed to prevent some of thee things from happening. I was going to Sunnydale!

LJ: Almost horrible, but not quite. Apparently multiple near apocalypses and the deaths of several friends and a family member just sorta bad.

Caroline: Man, I feel good. Sues are great for taking out the angeries. 

LJ: ...why do you drag me into these things?



Log in